Taking Positive Action

When I was very young in my career, I came across a quote that made me sit up and take notice.  At the time, I couldn't exactly explain why it struck a chord so deeply in me; but it simply did.  It's only as I've grown and lived it's truth that I've begun (yes, only begun) to understand.

The quote is from Reverend Vaughan Quinn, the famous (or infamous) plucky Canadian Catholic priest of Detroit's Sacred Heart, and chief personality of the Flying Fathers Hockey team.  It goes like this:

"The only way to get positive feelings about yourself is to take positive actions.  Man does not live as he thinks, he thinks as he lives."

As a recovered alcoholic himself, and the man responsible for developing an institution to help alcoholics and addicts gain and maintain sobriety, he undoubtedly understood this far more than I ever will.

Before I became a life coach, happiness was something very extrinsic to me.  It was based on circumstances, conditions, and all sorts of things outside of my control.  "If only I could get X (thing, job, whatever), then I'll be set.  I'll be on my way."

I did, to some degree, also know that happiness is a choice that you make from moment to moment.  An early reader of the Dalai Lama's The Art of Happiness, I understood that how I chose to interpret things, and how I chose to be played a huge part in how I felt.  And for most of my life, people have remarked to me about how they've found my consistent, high-level positivity as something to be admired and emulated.

Even so, there have been more than few points in my life where that positivity and 'happiness' has only been skin-deep.  And my satisfaction with who I am and the life I lead was at those times non-existent.  I was 'faking it till I made it,' and doing my best not to worry the people in my life with how unhappy and deeply depressed I was.

It's only as I've grown in my coaching practice, and striven at a much deeper level to become a better person, that I've realized how profoundly true this statement is.  I think, in many ways, it's something that can only begun to be understood through the doing.

As I've stood sentinel at the gateway of my thoughts, ruthlessly allowing thoughts to only be positive or in alignment with my personal vision, I've often been left feeling a sense of fraudulence and hollowness with my dissatisfaction growing more pervasive.

And then everything changed when I started taking massive positive action that was in harmony with the woman that I aspire to be. I, to borrow shamelessly from Nike, "Just Did It."  And instead of editing my thoughts first, I was instead taking those positive actions and re-wiring my thinking as I took them.  The difference was profound.

A faint malaise that had been with me so long I had stopped noticing it vanished, and for the first time I breathed without it's weight enshrouding me.  There was this sense of positivity that felt so natural and easy, as well as an appreciation for the people and things in my life.  I felt deeply and truly good and alive in a way I had never really experienced before.  The happiness felt true.

Of course, being an imperfect human, subject to the demands of life and a sneaky sneaky brain that liked it's energy efficiencies and old patterns, it was all too easy to fall back into modes where I stopped taking those positive actions.  It was incremental at first, but at a certain point I knew that I was way off track again.  And I felt it.

Discontent, depression, lack of interest - they were all alive and well and back in my life, and it was once again a battle royale to keep my thinking marshaled to the positive.  The difference, this time, was that I knew that I was 100% doing it to myself.  And I realized I had pretty much always done it to myself.

If we step outside of ourselves and observe how we treat ourselves - how we care for ourselves, the things we do to ourselves, and whether we keep our word to ourselves - how many of us would come to the conclusion that we are abusive, neglectful or downright disrespectful?

I would bet many would find that to be true.  And upon reflection, I've realized that in my case, it's been abundantly true.  In the past, when I was feeling low or upset about something, I've historically exacerbated the situation by taking negative actions that reinforced negative thoughts or negative outcomes to a sometimes gleefully sadistic degree.  As a result, life became more of a struggle, as did the effort of staying positive.

The moment I sat up, and said, "No more!" while concurrently taking those positive actions again, I could once again breathe.

So my challenge to you is this; over this next week focus on one positive action. Pick an action that says to you, "I love and respect myself, and I am a person worthy of good treatment."  This could be as simple as waking up at a healthy time or keeping your environment clean and tidy; or it could be more difficult, such as caring for yourself through better nutrition and exercise, or replacing a self-destructive habit with its counter.

Whatever it is, start implementing the positive action, and as you are doing it, state your affirmations of the person you would love becoming.  Keep your promise to yourself, and finish the week out doing this consistently.

Start your own journey of taking positive actions, and thinking as you live.  See the difference it makes, not only in terms of the impact on your life and your mental state, but in your experience with the activity itself.

Because the air, it is so sweet.